Welcome to Your 20’s

For almost 18 years, you and your peers are all moving on the same track. You’re all in high school and the biggest differences are after school activities and whether you’re in a relationship or not. Then, almost overnight, you wake up in your 20s and realize just how wildly different everyone’s paths have become.

One friend is living it up at a big state college, while another skipped school altogether and built a successful business. One just got engaged and moved across the country, while another is finishing her last semester of college with no clue what comes next. Someone else is newly single and focusing on herself, while another is balancing her own business with a healthy long-term relationship. Then there’s the friend who’s off chasing a career in her dream city like Carrie from Sex in the City.

I’m reflecting on all these situations because they’re a reminder of just how challenging it is to navigate your 20s. Everything is constantly changing, and it’s easy to feel lost in the chaos. Even from the few glimpses I shared, it’s clear—no two paths look the same.

So then I ask myself: Why do I feel the need to compare? Why do I look at the people around me, whether they’re close friends or just acquaintances, and convince myself that I’m somehow falling behind?

I’ve had this conversation with so many friends, and nearly all of them feel the same way. There’s this immense pressure to measure up to some imaginary standard of success—as if we’re all supposed to follow the same timeline or have everything figured out by a certain age.

For a long time, I felt stuck inside that box. I thought that because I didn’t know exactly what I wanted to be when I grew up, I was behind career-wise. That because I didn’t stay away at college and finished online instead, I had somehow missed out on “the college experience” (whatever the heck that even means). That because my life didn’t look like my friends’, I was doing something wrong.

But when I step back, I see a group of people I’ve known for years, all growing in completely different, amazing ways. None of our stories look the same, and the truth is none of them should look the same.

I know I’ve rambled on for a while but I feel like I’ve come to the realization that maybe the real challenge in your 20s isn’t about chasing some made-up timeline. Maybe it’s about realizing that your path, no matter how different it looks, is just as valid as everyone else’s.

If I hadn’t transferred from UCF to FAU online out of fear of missing the “college experience,” I would have never created my own nannying business or gained the financial freedom I had while studying. And if I had moved out and rented just because every other couple was doing it, I wouldn’t be as close as I am now to buying a house with my boyfriend.

Looking back, every decision—whether intentional or uncertain—led me to exactly where I’m supposed to be. That’s the thing about life: no two journeys will ever be identical, and that’s what makes them beautiful. Every choice, detour, and moment of uncertainty is shaping something uniquely yours.

With that being said, whenever you start doubting yourself or feeling uncertain about where you are compared to your peers, remember this—you are two completely different people, walking two completely different paths. Your journey is yours alone, and that’s exactly how it’s meant to be.

Until next time,

Ella xoxo